Contact me

Keep in touch, send me an email and I'll get back to you...
If I'm not busy or dead

Simone Bassani The Dark side of the light ©Giulia Conciatori
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Frequently Asked Questions

01

Are you open for new projects or commissions?

Wtf are you kidding me??? Damn, really???
Let's start in spelling I N E E D T O W O R K B E C A U S E I H A V E B I L L S T O P A Y L I K E A L L O T H E R P E O P L E
I'm open to any commission, no, sorry, I NEED ANY COMMISSION OR PROJECT but just if you want to pay me.
I'm an artist that doesn't mean I have no bills to pay or don't need to eat something. I eat a lot!!!

02

Do you offer photography work abroad?

Anywhere means that if you want me on Mars you just have to pay the ticket and my fee! Perhaps for dangerous places it is better if you pay before starting but it is not so exclusively necessary. Just keep in mind, don't ask me to work today in Kansas, tomorrow in Gujarat and the day after tomorrow in Puglia, I like to travel but it's not my main occupation. And if you want to book me for half an hour on Friday evening and Monday afternoon in New York, that doesn't mean that Saturday morning I'll be free for you.
And I just want to remind you that half an hour is not my daily fee divided for 48!!!

03

How big is your photography and videography crew?

As you like, I can start with a solo experience, support you with my team or support you with all the professionals I work with and that really means a lot more people than a Hollywood production crew. Normally I work alone or with my assistant, sometimes I work with many assistants and partners, so it just depends on your budget and your needs.
By the way, if you are asking me if we need a lot of space for housing and work, yes we do, I'm a guy the size of a hippo who ate a whale.
So you can imagine how much space I need to work!

04

What does Digital Image Consultant stands for? Are you a digital assistant?

That means that digital image is my world and I'll give you a solution and the support required in any situation from pre shooting to press.
Nothing will be over without a solution.
What? Over? Did you say 'over'? Nothing is over until we decide it is!
Was it over when the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor? Hell no!...
It ain't over now, 'cause when the goin' gets tough, the tough get goin'.
Who's with me? Let's go! Come on!...

05

I have seen your photographs and I like them very much, you are really good, I would like to work with you. I have a magnificent project that will be communicated on all my social networks and magazines that have millions of followers, I offer you the opportunity to do it for free to have great visibility on my channels. Are interested?

I think it's an interesting question, let me think.
Look, I have a beautiful project: since you like my images so much why don't you sponsor me on your profiles / magazines for free?
It would be a great opportunity for you, think about it.

06

I want to book you for a wedding: first class flight, 5 star luxury relais chateaux, 3 Michelin star restaurant for the whole trip, 4 days in a massage center, transfer with Rolls-Royce and an exclusive all inclusive pool party including handkerchiefs. Only one hour of work for you from 17.00 to 18.00 with the best light in the world. I pay you $ 10,000 a day for a week. Are interested?

Hell NO!

07

We have a problem: We commissioned a photographer from your competitor to do a job because it cost less than you, but we are not satisfied with the result. Since we have already invested a lot on the first shoot, could you come to meet us on the quote and do in asap?

Of course! Since you are in trouble, instead of increasing the first offer by 50% I will keep it unchanged. As for the working times, I will do my best to keep those planned, despite the fact that the flow of contractors has had a sudden stop and a resumption.

08

Since production costs have gone up a lot, could you come to us with a discount on the quote?

This is just the same question I did to the baker, the electricity manager, the supermarket, the taxman, the manufacturers of my technical tools ...

09

I took some beautiful photographs with my mobile phone but not having a professional camera I would need you to do them with you. It's an easy job, in half an hour you will solve it. Are you going to do them this afternoon?

If you are a so great photographer just buy a professional camera.

10

Since you are only a photographer and instead I have studied twenty years to take my two degrees and the three masters do what I tell you. Are you able to follow me?

No, I'm just a photographer, I have studied forty years to understand a small part of the world around me and I will still have many years of study to get to know at least a part of my profession. Although I have had consultants and trainers of international standing who have written the history of the world of image and communication, I have not yet reached the chapter on arrogant fools.

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